Act. Don’t React
The following, if followed in Fundamentalism would solve 95% of our problems.
Leadership is always premeditated.
1. Do not spend casual time with people who entice you to react.
2. Do not read things that make you react in your mind. (Bro. Hyles does not listen to call in talk shows.)
3. Be obvious to what makes you react when you must be around the action.
4. Plan your reactions before the battles. (A planned reaction is an action.)
5. Decide what reaction you are going to have in any given situation. (Crying baby, disturbances.) (I can’t turn it on, but I can turn on what turns it on. I can’t fake tears, but I know what makes me cry.)
6. Learn to whom you can trust your reaction. (Bro. Hyles spends time with people whom he feels will not provoke him to say something he should not say.)
7. Learn to whom you cannot trust your reaction. (You must then plan the conversation to steer clear of negative things that may cause you to react.) Control the subject, not the conversation.
If you could get this one thing tonight and nothing else it would be worth all your tuition.
8. Let it be known that you do not participate in criticism; this is an insurance against your reacting.
9. Don’t live in unplanned situation.
10. Don’t look for reactions from others; you then become the reactor.
(The problem with your marriage is that you look to your wife’s reaction to determine how you should react.)
Great leaders determine their response on the basis of need, not on the basis of response to someone’s provocation.
Leadership is not strength used, It is strength restrained.
Don’t allow yourself the luxury of mishandling your mistreatment.