Jack Hyles on FAIRNESS IN COUNSELING
A. Fairness to other preachers.
1. Do not counsel with their members unless they have a letter from their preacher.
2. Do not be one of many counselors.
3. Do not counsel contrary to another’s advice.
4. Tell them if your advice differs from your pastor’s, follow his.
5. Do not believe accusations against preachers.
6. Always stay on the side of authority.
B. Fairness to person with whom you are counseling.
1. Do not counsel by mail.
2. Do not counsel by phone.
3. Do not counsel when excessively weary.
4. Do not make them wait unnecessarily.
5. Always ask God for wisdom first.
6. Listen to his side.
7. Do not interrupt.
8. Take occasional notes.
9. Look at him attentively.
10. Do not act superior.
11. Treat him with dignity and respect.
12. Hold everything in strict confidence.
13. Do not decide your feeling beforehand.
14. Do not decide because of reputation.
15. Do not condemn; don’t preach.
16. Look for good motives in any wrongdoing.
17. Before advising tell him good points.
18. Make nobody always wrong
C. Fairness to others.
1. Hear both sides.
2. Do not form an opinion on just one side.
3. Do not do marital counseling with just one party.
4. Do not counsel through a third party.
5. Only counsel when asked, otherwise do not tell your opinion.
6. Do not let a child or teen give his side in front of his parents.
7. Do not believe or disbelieve what you hear.
8. Do not volunteer counsel.
D. Fairness to your family.
1. Do not counsel in your home.
2. Give them an appointment too.
E. Fairness to yourself.
1. Do not counsel in their home.
2. Only tell them things you want told; don’t trust anyone to hold anything in confidence.